There's no formula for it. The dating websites won't tell you that, but it's true. Compatability remains elusive despite our best efforts to capture it and bottle it up for consumption. Don't get me wrong, I work with people often who have enjoyed satisfying relationships as a result of these services, but they really function more as an intelligent meeting place rather than a portal to "the right person". Many are lonely during this season and longing for a soul mate to share life with. Even though I've been married for 13 years now, I can still remember the lonely gut-ache that would accompany my awareness of being single with no prospects.
I don't have any formulas for people either. There was a person who gave me some great encouragement in this area. I really wish I could remember who it was, because I would call them and thank them. They told me:
"Run your race, as hard as you can. Run hard after your Creator. Run hard after your passions and desires. Run hard after your dreams. Cultivate your talents and gifts. Pursue the horizon of your own life relentlessly, and at some point, you may look to the left or the right, and find that others are running in the same direction alongside you. You'll know it when this happens."
I believe there's nothing more attractive than a person who is examining their own life in a co-creative effort with God. Peace to you this season if you are feeling the ache of loneliness in your heart, and joy as you run your race. -Grant